I've had this journal for eight years now. that seems hard to believe. that's the meaty part of a decade. i started this journal because my friends shawn and candi were on here. i thought it was quite a novel idea to be able to share communication on-line outside of the typical Instant Message/Chat Room forums. i also may have thought i had something to say and contribute to the world wide web. Who knew that, 8 years later, it would be incredibly uncommon for anyone to NOT have 300 million people in their online social network. and, as it turns out, i've more often had nothing to say than something to say.
back to present day...
i've been working at Trader Joe's for 16 months now, been training for a promotion for 7 months. this week, someone else got promoted. I was jumped. for what reason, i can't be clear. it could have been favoritism, it could have been age, but the bottom line is, i'm salty about these events.
i worked last night with ABSOLUTELY no inspirato, no motivation, no 'sense of urgency'. at the end of the night, after receiving an apology from the manager on hand for being jumped, i was told..."You know what you need to do, and frankly, I saw it tonight, I saw that second gear..."
contradiction surrounds my employment. lord knows i can deal with that.
at the heart of this situation is my unwillingness (but ability) to be a retail all-star. i have an unnecessarily large amount of respect for retail workers. this trait does not make me a natural selection for retail management. historically, to be management, you must be first focused on the customers, second focused on productivity and profit, and third (lastly) focused on pleasing the staff. my mind flips that list. i'm a valuable member of the staff, and respected by all of my co-workers, and blah blah blah.